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The finger-staring is annoying, but now my boss has taken this to another level. My boss noticed I’m not wearing it anymore, and I’ve caught her staring at my finger. I stopped wearing my wedding band and engagement ring. Recently, I realized my longtime marriage had to end. I work on a small marketing team for a hospital, and it’s just my boss and me.
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#Roxane gay engagement ring how to
Figure out how to grow your skills and at the same time, recognize that you are of use and that being of use takes many different forms. Do you need to take a class or workshop? Do you need to practice these skills and study the latest books? Do you need to ask a co-worker to mentor you? You have a lot of options here. It does seem like you want to improve your technical skills, so you should make a plan for doing that work. If you weren’t doing your fair share, that would be a problem, but this isn’t that. You have nothing to feel guilty about, as you aren’t doing anything wrong. He is happy, and I suspect you’re relieved. You and your co-worker have found a balance that suits your strengths. I pick up whatever tasks he doesn’t do, and I know this is a good problem to have, but I feel inadequate and guilty and am wondering how to best grow my work skills.
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I’m able to do the minimum tech tasks required for my job - slowly and laboriously.
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Our supervisor doesn’t care how the work is divided as long as it gets done. He gets it done more quickly and accurately than me and says he enjoys it. Since we started this arrangement, he’s invented useful shortcuts that have allowed him to take on what seems like the lion’s share of our work. I share a manager position with a conscientious and hardworking co-worker who has much better tech skills than me. And in an ideal world, he wouldn’t take credit for your work, but he does it because he can it is fairly standard practice. Your boss doesn’t participate in the creative process because he doesn’t have to. As a communications person, you are generally communicating as the organization or its leadership, not as an individual with a byline. It is not unusual for executives to have staff ghostwrite for them. It is always important to bring attention to the most critical issues of our day. It is certainly OK for you to do your job, and it is wonderful that the writing you’re doing serves a greater purpose. Is it OK to continue to ghostwrite for this man if it serves a greater purpose? Is this normal for a C.E.O./communications staff relationship? I want to work with someone committed to the work of racial justice, but I feel like we are just paying lip service. He seems to think you can order up beautifully written takes on police brutality, felons’ voting rights, Covid-19 inequities, etc., in the same way you order a plate of pancakes. I’ve tried to make this a collaborative process. My boss wants to be more of a “thought leader” on issues of racial justice, but his only “leadership” is to demand I write blog posts and op-eds about his commitment to equity and justice - and put his byline on them. I work for a small, progressive nonprofit as the only full-time communications person. Include your name and location, or a request to remain anonymous. Send questions about the office, money, careers and work-life balance to.